♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Seiso)

After the NJO, Jacen Solo, aka Darth Cadeus, becomes head of the Galactic Alliance and begins to secretly recruit Ben Skywalker as his apprentice. Ben is having none of it though. Cadeus openly reveals himself as Sith and begins to follow in his Grandfather’s footsteps. Jaina, as Sword of the Jedi, cuts him down like a two dollar box of cardboard. This is the Legacy of the Force.

Next up was Fate of the Jedi. Luke has withdrawn after his complete failure with Jacen and it is up to the other Jedi to keep the Academy running. Unfortunately, Jedi begin going mad on Coruscant and killing until brought down and sedated. Admiral Daala becomes head of the GA and outlaws the Jedi and institutes a hunt that makes Order 66 look like childs play.

Now if certain ideas sound familiar, that is because the new movies stole ideas left and right from the old EU books. Of course, they stole all the crap and produced crap films.  By the end of FotJ, I was done. When a whole planet of Sith was revealed, I just gave up.  Then Lucas Arts announced that the EU books were no longer canon and everything that I had been following was now just fan-fic. Stabbed in the back by Lucas himself.

 

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Traviss keeps her Mando story going. Interesting, until it was simply shut down. Bleh.

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Han and Leia have seen one child die and another turn to the darkside. Oh, and that darksider? He kills Mara, Luke’s wife. What a guy!

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Han and Leia now have to watch their daughter kill their son. How much misery does this poor couple have to endure?

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The Jedi go crazy and Luke and Ben try to figure out why

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Admiral Daala, former Imperial, is now in charge. And a planet of Sith are revealed.

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At this point I don’t remember the storyline, except that all the characters who were meant to carry the Star Wars Torch have fallen by the wayside. Bad writing, bad planning, bad ideas

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The last 3 Star Wars books I bought. Even as I bought them I knew they couldn’t save my interest. A drowning man’s final desperate grasp onto a sinking straw. In other words, doomed to failure.

 

So there you have it folks. 6 days of Star Wars covers. What am I supposed to do with them all? I simply don’t want them any more and worst case, I’ll throw them away. Second worst case is I donate them to a fundraiser my cousin’s stepson regularly participates in. Best case is I sell them for free on Craigslist and score some cash.

Well, whatever. I’m over my reading funk by sheer dint of being bored out of my skull.  Tomorrow I am going to read all day and make a Survival Saturday post. A good book by Adrian Tchaikovsky and some “interesting” food, sounds like a perfect way to spend my Saturday.

 

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♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Fiveo)

In the deep depths of space, there is only war, continual war…

…..

Oh wait, wrong franchise.

Sadly, someone should have told that to the editors crafting the next series of Star Wars books. The New Jedi Order was 20+ books long and was nothing but the Star Wars Galaxy fighting off an alien invasion. It delved deeply into grim territory. Back in the Correllian Trilogy and other books, Luke and Mara had a son named Ben. Han and Leia had 3 kids, Jacen, Jain and Anakin. These series were meant to pass on the story torch to a new generation. Sadly, hardly one author could do so and the storylines after NJO became even more convoluted and outlandish. The Star Wars torch began to gutter out.

 

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The Yuuhzon Vong invade. They worship pain and are outside the Force

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Also, they are a complete culture of warriors. And Chewie dies.

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Jaina begins her training as Sword of the Jedi while Jacen begins flirting with the Dark Side

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Anakin sacrifices himself and Luke brings the Yuuzhon Vong into the Force

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Bugs and a wicked bad storyline

 

Folks, there was simply nothing good about these books. Redemption was swept aside and carnage, on a planetary scale, was the name of the game. Surely things will get better from here every fan asked…

 

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♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Cuatroo)

These books show some of the best of the EU and some of the worst. Writers, while not quite having a blank check, did not have a lot of backstory to worry about or future story to worry about. It was a wide open range and they wrote with all the vigor of a herd of buffalos. Some of the writings smelled like a herd of buffalos had camped too. Win some and lose some I guess.

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We’re keeping the X-Wing books.

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Stackpole wrote well….

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…and Allston wrote funny

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One of these books wa a real stinker. Hint- it wasn’t the one where Han woos Leia…

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Anderson wrote a hack trilogy

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Before there was Mara Jade, there was Callista. She was supposed to be a love interest for Luke. Didn’t work out.

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Only a Star Wars Completist would read either of these!

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Thus the taming of Star Wars was complete

 

After these books, the Star Wars EU entered into real Franchise territory, with large storylines being plotted out by editors and multiple authors taking up the mantle. Honestly, the Powers that Be wanted Star Wars to be edgier, grittier and darker. I feel that these books here, no matter how badly written, still captured the spirit of hope and redemption that was showcased in the original movies. Prepare yourselves for dark times ahead.

 

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♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Treso)

Ok, it is only Wednesday and I’ve already watched way more Youtube than I ever want to for the rest of my life. I feel like my brain has inhaled whole bottles of spray cheese.

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Poodles are to Dogs what Easy Cheese is to Cheese

Ughh. How do people DO this? I think I’m ready to read just about anything, even a romance! *shudder*

 

Ok, now we are moving on to books immediately surrounding the first movie trilogy, with Luke, Han and Leia taking centerstage, as they should.

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A treso of trilogies. Han Solo Adventures are WAY better than the Han Solo Trilogy

 

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The Han Solo Adventures in individual hardcovers. Written in 1979 and 1980. Awesome baby!

 

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Yoda was BLUE in the novelization. Weird huh?

 

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I call these the Miquels, as they take place in the Middle of the trilogy between the main events

 

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These “Tales” books were good, except for the Bounty Hunter Wars. That was bad.

 

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Quite possibly the worst Star Wars book I ever read.  Tied with The Crystal Star, which will be in another post

Alien reptiles in robot bodies that eat the Force. THAT is the quality of story you got in one of these books. I doubt you have to guess very hard which one. You can’t fake this folks, it really was written about and worked into the now defunct EU canon. This was the beginning of the Wild West Era of Star Wars. Luke smashed moons together, Han flew the galaxy. Leia, well, honestly, she didn’t do a whole lot yet. But don’t worry, her heyday is just around the corner.

 

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♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Doso)

Since the last couple of reads I’ve had just plain stank, I’m taking a week long break from reading and posting reviews. I’m wasting my time on Youtube, so that I can feel ever so superior once I stop next week and posting book covers to keep my blog alive.

Self-Righteous Nihilism without apology. And anger. Because Star Wars used to be great (even if the stories were terrible, and let me tell you, some of them were B-A-D!!!!!) and now it’s drunk and puking in the gutters, begging for spare change from any passing stranger. Even Forgotten Realms has more dignity these days.

So hearken back with me to the glory days when we all thought Star Wars could be great again.

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Traviss could write, but man, did she hate the very idea of the Jedi and she let that hatred shine on through in her writing

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Half of these books were pretty good and the other half really stank

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The novelization of the Revenge of the Sith was probably one of the best Star Wars books I have ever read. If the movie had been half as good, it would have been the best Star Wars movie anyone had ever seen

 

And this brings us up to the Infamous Episode 3.  That movie was a dagger in the heart of a lot of fans. Not the story necessarily, but the poor acting, poor writing and poor directing. Lucas is squarely to blame.  It took a lot of “I love Star Wars” for me to buy some of these back in the day.

 

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♪How do you solve a problem ♪like♪ Star Wars♪? (Parto Uno)

What with having 4 books in a row just be beyond stinkers, I’m taking a break from reading for a week.

I used to be a huge star wars fan. But that fandom began its death back in ’12 or so and its death throes happened when I watched The Force Awakens. I had been collecting Star Wars books ever since the 90’s though and continued to buy them in hardcover from the Science Fiction Book Club up until I bought  Kenobi near the end of ’13.  I have accumulated a lot of Star Wars novels, with most of them being in hardcover. They take up 3 shelves, double stacked, on one of my book shelves and honestly, it is time for them to go. Mrs B wants to keep the X-Wing books as they are just good adventure stories, star wars or no star wars.

I don’t know what to do with them all now. So before I make any decisions, I’m just going to do a couple of posts showcasing them all so if I ever feel regret once they’re gone, I can simply look at these posts and be all good.

 

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From the very failed Old Republic video game novel tie-ins

 

 

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Darth Bane Trilogy

 

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Prequels leading up to Episode One aka The Phantom Menace

 

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All 4 variant covers for Episode One.

 

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Prequels leading up to Episode Two, aka Attack of the Clones

 

 

 

I’ve tried to group my books together by Era, which seems the best way. I believe it is all chronological, but with them no longer being canon, who knows.  14 books, with about 90+ more to go. Hope you all like Star Wars covers 😉

 

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The Jedi Doth Return (William Shakespeare’s Star Wars #3)

5fd17a25cc4b7d74e6ea8ccc06138926This review is written with a GPL 3.0 license and the rights contained therein shall supersede all TOS by any and all websites in regards to copying and sharing without proper authorization and permissions. Crossposted at Bookstooge.booklikes.blogspot.wordpress.leafmarks.com & Bookstooge’s Reviews on the Road Facebook Group by Bookstooge’s Exalted Permission.

Title: The Jedi Doth Return

Series: William Shakespeare’s Star Wars

Author: Ian Doescher

Rating: 4 of 5 Battle Axes

Genre: SFF

Minutes: 215

Format: Audio book

 

 

 

Synopsis:

No summary, why bother? I know this story beyond what I care about.

 

My Thoughts:

I ended up listening to half of this while working at the office the other weekend. And that was a problem. I knew this story, so I didn’t feel it necessary to actually listen to this and hence I would simply zone out and miss huge chunks of the story.

Which was ok since I knew the story.

But if this had been another book, it would have been a complete failure and I would have missed so much that nothing would have made sense. It did make me realize that I can only listen to audiobooks while driving to and from work.